Jealousy and the Success of Others

Jealousy and the Success of Others

“If a woman wants to succeed…she needs to grow skin as thick as the hide of a rhinoceros. I have certainly...and there's a lot of good moisturizers I can tell you about if you're interested.”

 - Hillary Clinton

Periodically I find myself judging others.   Not proud to admit that but owning the truth is one way of accepting my humanness.  Anyone who knows me knows that when Hillary Clinton was running for president of the USA in 2016 I judged her heavily for always wearing pantsuits.   I couldn’t get my head around why she wouldn’t change up her “look”.  I am one who can change my look with ease - I have 12 pairs of glasses! - so I find find it exciting to explore and create different looks for myself.  Back to Hillary, I was judging her for her wardrobe choices...or was I?  As I reflect on that period of time, I realized I was trying to mask my own jealousy, to hid how I really felt about a woman who had accomplished as much as she has.   Let’s be clear, I definitely don’t want the life of a politician (I have neither the stomach nor the spirit for it) however I reflected on what this woman has accomplished in her life, and some jealousy came through. I confronted this envy I had found and decided I would dig a little deeper into the concept of jealousy, and guess what I came up with? I felt Hillary was more prosperous than I was; I was uncomfortable with that, so I made fun of her clothing.  How’s that for contemplation? 

Whilst I was exercising my contemplative skills I was reminded of a book I read many years ago.  It is called Open Your Mind to Prosperity and it was a profound read for me at the time.   I recall reading this book with a very open mind (as the title suggests) and I was able to peel away another level of “not good enough” feelings that I had been carrying with me for the majority of my life.   So I dug up the book and spent some time this afternoon re-reading it.  

There is a segment called “The Psychology of Poverty”.  It suggests that people with less can be caught up in their present problems, so that they do not plan or think ahead.  There can be great hostility and envy, even suspicion and resentment toward people who succeed in life.  This speaks of monetary abundance, but also of professional achievement, education, material belongings, relationship and more.  Wherever there is wanting, there is room for jealousy.  I learned this about myself thanks to a couple of pantsuits!

I was grateful to read it again as I contemplated how I really felt about that Hillary’s fashion choices.  I recall deciding back then that I was going to be aware of any “lack thinking” on my part.   I was determined to remind myself that I am prosperous as well, in so many beautiful ways, and that Hillary is welcome to her pantsuits…I made peace with them now.   Can you take it when someone else has something great happen to them?   When they succeed?  When their bank account grows and grows and grows?  Are you happy for them, or does the green-eyed monster rear his ugly head?  Send me a quick email or text with any thoughts around this…..I look forward to hearing from you!  

With immense love and joy.

'Good Riddance to Guilt' or 'Lessons Learned in Lockdown'

'Good Riddance to Guilt' or 'Lessons Learned in Lockdown'

Shaped by Music

Shaped by Music